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What I Said People I Vex So busy! Pansy Sod Off Back In Time Sod Off Back In Time Sod Off Forward Sod Off Forward
. . . - Perfectly Pansy
The malevolent have hidden teeth.
perfectly_pansy
perfectly_pansy
. . .
Kill me now.


I hate the Knight Bus.

I'm feeling: nauseated nauseated

36 comments because Wear pink knickers
Comments
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 08:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
You should try a Muggle bus sometime.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 08:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
You are mocking me.

Would you come and kill me please?
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 08:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Never. Merely following up on an old conversation.

It seems like a moot point now, doesn't it? The torture has passed. You are no longer on the Knight Bus. You wish for me to become a murderer because of you?
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes, yes. I remember. NEVER, JUSTIN!!! NEVER!!!

The torture has not passed, for I can't leave the loo and when I close my eyes I feel like the room is spinning and spinning.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 09:11 pm (UTC) (Link)
Never say never.

I am touched you are updating us from the loo. Surely you can take a potion for the after affects?
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sometimes it's okay to say never.

They're not helping. They never do. I don't know why! It's happened every time I've had opportunity to ride the Knight Bus.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 09:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, yes, it is okay to say never sometimes - but that doesn't mean something will never come to pass just because you said it.

Sincerely, then, I am sorry. I've only rode on the Knight Bus a few times and I can see why it might make you ill. Perhaps this is one case where I should be thankful I just had a short ride on a Muggle one.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
I suppose you are right (and note I am only conceding your point because I am too nauseated to argue extensively)

It wouldn't have been so bad, except I got squashed something terrible when it squeezed between two Muggle lorries. I stood up at the wrong time, and when it squeezed between the lorries I had my ears boxed by the sides of the Knight Bus itself.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 09:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
Excellent. I'll take a win anyway I can.

Ah, that explains it then. I am very sorry. Alas, I still cannot bring myself to kill you. I think you should distract yourself with thoughts of less... ear boxing things.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heh, you'd better.

Did you go home, then?
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 10:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes, I did. It's been too long since I've been back. And I felt I needed to spend more than a rushed day with my parents.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes. I was going to go home, but Daddy had arranged for Mother to be seen by specialists in London, and they couldn't reschedule. The wait is two months.

So I am in Wales. It's beautiful here.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 10:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
I hope her visit goes well. Let me know how she's doing, okay?

I've only visited once or twice, but I've heard all the legends. You deserve a holiday in a beautiful place.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
She's doing very well, actually. She's having a specific treatment done -- it involves electric eels, and is considered experimental. I'll definitely let you know how it goes.

That's nice of you to say that, Justin.

Tomorrow I might actually look outside.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 11:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Electric eels...? Okay. Thank you.

It's the truth. So, please, do find a moment to look outside.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 11:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
One on each temple.

The view inside is just perfect. But, I will take the time to look outside just the same.
trained_wizard From: trained_wizard Date: October 27th, 2004 11:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
Er, right then.

Please do. And then I expect a full report! ;)
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 08:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, so you took the knight bus after all?
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 08:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh God, Draco, you have no idea . . . I'm still heaving.
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 08:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm a bit sorry I didn't get to enact my plan. I was going to take the Knight Bus to Malfoy Manor and camp out on the grounds, wearing a flashing placard that read: The Ministry Stole My House. I suppose I'll have to save my protest skills for another time. At any rate, Mother and I bought out nearly all of Diagon Alley. I am currently drinking wine (which the Ministry returned to my father's cellar, much to my surprise) and having my toenails trimmed by one of our new House Elves. I don't know what happened to all the old ones. They were rather useless anyway.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:06 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh my GOD, that would have been BRILLIANT! I almost wish the Ministry had just delayed a day or two, so you could have put your plan into action. Bloody criminals is what they are . . . and they point fingers our way? Please. Spare me.

I'm thrilled you were able to indulge yourself thoroughly! What else did you get?

I always did love your toenails -- they're so elegant!
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
I almost wish it as well. I was looking forward to the Daily Prophet article.

Oh, I got a new broom -- a Firebolt v.2, like Blaise's. Also a tonne of books and sweets, four pairs of cufflinks (one pair shaped like small serpents with emerald eyes), a screech owl, a new potions set with top of the line cauldrons in all sizes, presents for you, Tracey, and Father, a tree that grows purple lemons (I don't know why I bought this; I suppose it was an impulse purchase), an entire new school wardrobe (we won't be getting dress robes in Diagon Alley -- Mother wants to go to France for those), and a couple of interesting items from the other Alley.

Oh, thanks. Well, they're starting to look that way again.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ooo, I'm surprised that the Daily Prophet ran the article at all; after all, it doesn't quite fit the Ministry's agenda. I hate the Ministry. It's full of incompetent sycophants.

That's fantastic about your broom. Please do not name it Knockers or anything like that. Your broom should have a regal name, not a vulgar one.

PRESENTS!!! You should come visit us over the weekend and bring them along -- bring your new broom and I'll go flying with you (once I've stopped whirling on the bathroom floor).

When are you going to France?
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
I hate them as well. Tomorrow I'm doing a full tour of the Manor to see what they kept for themselves, as I've no doubt they failed to return everything to its proper place.

I don't believe in naming inanimate objects.

I can't visit as I believe we are going to France this weekend. You'll just have to wait until Sunday night to get your present. If I'd known you were still going to take the knight bus I would have bought you one of those self-cleaning travel basins.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
I completely believe you. I wouldn't be surprised if Malfoy heirlooms are financing the Minister's salary.

I suppose I don't either. I name my pets, but my pink Beater's bat doesn't have a name. She is a she, though -- I know that much!

Oh, I'm sorry that you can't come to visit. I should like to visit with you when you're in a good humour! The self-cleaning travel basin would have been most welcome. At least I was able to hide under Nathaniel's mother's invisibility cloak. I'm still mortified though; that's why I've locked myself in the loo!
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:37 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, all the silver is still here. Mother already checked. But there are dozens of other rooms to go through, not to mention the drawing room.

Nathaniel's mother has an invisibility cloak? That's a funny think for a mother to own. I should have thought to have Mother buy one for me today. I'll have to remember it when I'm in France.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:39 pm (UTC) (Link)
Now that I've no reason to hold my tongue, I just have to say I think the whole thing was disgusting, and entirely unnecessary.

Why's it any funnier for a mother to own an invisibility cloak than a father? If you get your own, can I borrow it?
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Since when do you ever have a reason to hold your tongue? Though I agree entirely, of course.

It's funny for any parent. Maybe I just don't like the idea of adults skulking around and watching me without my knowledge.

Actually, I don't like the idea of anyone watching me without my knowledge. If I purchase one and you borrow it you have to swear that you won't use it on me.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
I have reason to hold my tongue when someone I love might be subject to petty retaliation by the subject of my ire -- specifically, I thought perhaps if I spoke my mind regarding the Ministry's ineptitude as of late, it might impede your family's rightful claim to what is theirs.

I might swear it . . . we perhaps might make a deal.
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I see. Well. Thank you for that.

Might? I assure you there is nothing I do in private that you would find interesting or scandalous in the least. Not anymore.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:56 pm (UTC) (Link)
You would have done the same for me.

No, it's not that. Hmm. Let's just say if you should never find cause to complain of a new, sixth roommate, I might be persuaded to promise to never spy on you from under the folds of your own invisibility cloak!
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 09:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Would I have? I am perhaps even less skilled at holding my tongue than you.

Okay, it's a deal.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yes, you would have. Draco, let's face it: it truly is a draw, when it comes to which one of us is the least skilled at holding our tongue.

Fantastic! Come Monday, expect a pink toothbrush to appear by the sink.
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
At any rate I don't think it a wise idea for us to have a contest just to find out.

Very well. But I can't be held responsible if Greg knocks it into the toilet.
perfectly_pansy From: perfectly_pansy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
God, no. I wouldn't dream of suggesting it.

I'll tie it to the faucet so it's not at risk. Because that is just sick and wrong.

I feel a bit better now. I think I'm going to crawl to my room and try and get some sleep.

Goodnight, Draco.
malfoy From: malfoy Date: October 27th, 2004 10:11 pm (UTC) (Link)
'Night.
36 comments because Wear pink knickers